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disappointed Wow. Work was, in a word, craptacular.
Somewhere along the line I picked up a nice GI bug, which is making my lower back feel like it's being squeezed by a vice.
To top it off, I was once again bombarded by weirdos at work, but they weren't the fun ones. They were the persistant, annoying, demanding ones. Imagine, if you will, a handful of flies buzzing around your head all day. yeah.
Dr. Reid, bless him, called me in b/c he had a patient whose trapesius was spasming so badly it was shaking him. I got in and, with some difficulty, got him to lay down. As I massaged his neck, he just shook and shook. I saw the familiar tic in the cheek that signals someone who's trying not to cry. I rubbed until he calmed down and the shaking stopped. The Pain-Spasm-Pain cycle is a bitch.
When I got him to sit up, the shaking started again and the pillow had huge wet spots on it. Dr Reid eventually got his nurse to come in and give an injection of ibuprofen, but still...my heart went out to that guy.
I stay extra because my first massage client isn't until 4:30 p.m. I'm somewhat excited b/c today my 1 1/2 hr. massage dude who tips well was due in.
Guess who no-showed? Yup. No phone call, no tip, no massage, and my afternoon was wasted. Sue, bless her heart, got angry for me again. ^_^ But that still didn't keep me from becoming disheartened.
I ended up getting really upset on the way home and after some minutes of merging, passing, remerging, I figured out why: I helped NO ONE today. I did nothing good or helpful. I didn't really take away one person's pain (and my one client who DID show up doesn't count b/c he had nothing wrong with him basically).
I feel like I really DID totally waste my day, and I don't waste time. Time is money, and time is far too precious to just faff away like that.
I hate feeling useless. I've already started thinking about what other areas of medicine I'd like to go in, but nothing obvious is appealing to me. Besides, I don't want another loan over my head...I can't afford to fund any more bastard PHEAA retreats to mountain resorts.
*sigh*
August 18 2005, 01:00:25 UTC 6 years ago
I was somewhat useful today--but...oh well...
Whichever journel you check first...call me lol I kinda wanna talk to ya before Fri and tomorrow I wont be home
August 18 2005, 15:02:44 UTC 6 years ago
I'll try calling your cell sometime this afternoon whilst i'm on break. *nod*
August 18 2005, 02:49:34 UTC 6 years ago
I thought you seemed kinda down when you got home this evening...
But please know this... Helping people doesn't just stick to physical massage-y stuff. You also help out by what you say. How else does SRFP keep going with the energy so high? Who else calms jaded clients down with a few simple words (GO TO THE DAMN ER!)? Who else can make me feel more comfortable at the clinic?
Seriously, 'Nisa, I feel so much more comfortable there because I know you're there. And when you leave, I get a bit nervous.
Wait... that probably didn't help...
What I'm trying to say is... You help out more than what you may realize.
We all love you very much. ^_^
*more hugs*
August 18 2005, 14:58:55 UTC 6 years ago
LOL! You're too damn cute. :P *huggle squish*
Yeah, I know I can help out in other ways than just massage thingies, but it kind of stems from two things: 1) i spent a lot of time, effort, and money into being a MT and i want it to be successful (unlike my other degree) and 2) it means a little more because i'm doing it by myself and not in a team setting, if that makes sense.